{"id":444,"date":"2012-05-21T22:28:22","date_gmt":"2012-05-22T05:28:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/baby\/?page_id=444"},"modified":"2021-09-17T20:44:49","modified_gmt":"2021-09-18T03:44:49","slug":"developing-consistent-rhythm-routine","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/baby\/baby-sleep-tips-contents\/developing-consistent-rhythm-routine\/","title":{"rendered":"Developing a Consistent Rhythm &amp; Routine"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-thumbnail wp-image-1311 alignleft\" title=\"Developing a Consistent Rhythm &amp; Routine\" src=\"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/5\/2013\/10\/child_1381785630-150x150.jpg\" alt=\"Developing a Consistent Rhythm &amp; Routine\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" \/><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">The 3 Most Important Things&#8230;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">In <em><strong>real estate<\/strong><\/em>, the 3 most important things are &#8220;<em><strong>location location location<\/strong><\/em>.&#8221;\u00a0 In <em><strong>baby sleep<\/strong><\/em>, the 3 most important things are &#8220;<em><strong>consistent routine, consistent routine, consistent routine<\/strong><\/em>.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Do it over and over again:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\"><em><strong>Daily repetition<\/strong><\/em> is one of the keys to help your baby have an <em><strong>easy time falling asleep<\/strong><\/em>. You can help your baby have a comfortable <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><a title=\"Sleep Through the Night and Transitioning Techniques\" href=\"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/baby\/big-list-baby-sleep-tips\/sleep-night-transitioning-techniques\/\" rel=\"noopener\">transition <\/a><\/span>into sleep.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">A <em><strong>consistent routine<\/strong><\/em> day after day at bedtime is the foundation of healthy\u00a0baby-toddler-kid sleep.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\"> It&#8217;s the keystone that <em><strong>allows for the success<\/strong><\/em> of all the <em><strong>other tips and techniques<\/strong><\/em> you try. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">It helps babies feel comfortable and <em><strong>safe<\/strong><\/em>. Not only is a nighttime routine <em><strong>comforting<\/strong><\/em> to babies &#8211; it will increase the likelihood that they\u2019ll <em><strong>fall asleep more easily and stay asleep longer<\/strong><\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">You can help <em><strong>set your baby&#8217;s body clock<\/strong><\/em> by establishing a consistent bedtime by the time your baby is four weeks old. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">It&#8217;s important to <em><strong>keep the bedtime consistent<\/strong><\/em> because it is the repetition that will set their body clock.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Make a plan:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Babies usually go to sleep more easily and stay asleep longer when you give them the gift of consistent <em><strong>&#8220;going to sleep&#8221; rituals<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Familiar bedtime rituals give your baby <em><strong>cues that set them up for sleep<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Using the <em><strong>same sequence<\/strong><\/em> of things gives your baby a sense that <em><strong>sleep is to follow<\/strong><\/em>. This routine could include:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Getting ready at the <em><strong>same time<\/strong><\/em> each night for bed<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">A warm <em><strong>bath<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Putting your baby into <em><strong>pajamas<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\"><em><strong>Darkening<\/strong><\/em> their room<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Repeating the <em><strong>same actions<\/strong><\/em> with them right before putting them down to sleep &#8211; night after night.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">As your baby&#8217;s brain is developing &#8211; they are <em><strong>storing patterns<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">When you repeat the bedtime routine, in the same way, each night &#8211; <em><strong>your baby learns the steps that lead them to drift off to sleep<\/strong><\/em> &#8211; and they begin to <em><strong>expect it and embrace it<\/strong><\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">These associations can help the baby connect to the physiological state needed to fall asleep. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">You may not see results right away &#8211; but rest assured that all the effort you&#8217;ve put into <em><strong>establishing a routine<\/strong><\/em> during the first <em><strong>couple of months<\/strong><\/em> will begin to pay off by the time they are 2 months old.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Do it slowly in the dark:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Give yourself plenty of time for your routine, so you <em><strong>don&#8217;t have to rush<\/strong><\/em> through the sequence of activities. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">The target is to be <em><strong>calm, quiet and slow<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">You&#8217;re <em><strong>getting them ready to sleep &#8211; not entertaining them<\/strong><\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Do as much of your routine in their <em><strong>darkened or dimmed<\/strong><\/em> room as possible. This way <em><strong>they will associate<\/strong><\/em> their bedroom, the darkness, their crib, the rocker, etc. with <em><strong>happy, safe feelings<\/strong><\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Following this routine, at the <em><strong>same time<\/strong><\/em>, each night is very important.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Do it your way:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">My routine looked like this (you can make up your own personalized routine)&#8230;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">At night I&#8217;d get our baby into <em><strong>pajamas<\/strong><\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">I&#8217;d <em><strong>hold them<\/strong><\/em>, and I&#8217;d <em><strong>walk around the room<\/strong><\/em> (I have one boy and one girl several years apart).<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">With my son, I&#8217;d so <em><strong>softly and slowly say<\/strong><\/em> &#8220;Goodnight&#8221; to four things in the room. <\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">I&#8217;d say, &#8220;<em><strong>Goodnight flower<\/strong><\/em>&#8221; (a picture that hung on the wall)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">&#8220;<em><strong>goodnight fairies<\/strong><\/em>&#8221; (a silk fairy mobile on which I&#8217;d give a little blow to make it rotate gently)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\"> &#8220;<em><strong>goodnight horse<\/strong><\/em>&#8221; (a framed picture of a horse and I&#8217;d make a tiny horse sound)<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\"> &#8220;<em><strong>goodnight goose<\/strong><\/em>&#8221; (a wooden goose mobile whose wings would gently sway up and down while I made a little goose honk, honk, honk sound that faded off into the distance). <\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Obviously inspired by the book <a href=\"http:\/\/amzn.to\/2fAG7Bv\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Goodnight Moon<\/span><\/a>. <span style=\"font-size: 12pt;\"><em>(Amazon Affiliate links like this one help pay for the free content on my sites. When you purchase from Amazon within 24 hours of clicking on an affiliate link Amazon gives me a small commission. Using the link doesn\u2019t affect the price you pay. Thanks for your support!)<\/em><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Then I&#8217;d <em><strong>walk around<\/strong><\/em> their room in a small circle, holding them and <em><strong>slowly swaying back and forth, singing<\/strong><\/em> the same few songs to them each night while <em><strong>oh so gently patting \/ burping them<\/strong><\/em> in time to my singing.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">When the last song was over, I&#8217;d <em><strong>very gently<\/strong><\/em> put them down in their crib. Usually, they were <em><strong>nearly asleep<\/strong><\/em> by this point.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Once in a while, they were still <em><strong>more awake<\/strong><\/em> when I laid them down, and they would <em><strong>begin to make noises<\/strong><\/em>. I&#8217;d simply say &#8220;shhhhhhhhhh&#8221; as I gave them one last <em><strong>gentle but firm touch<\/strong><\/em> and then I <em><strong>slowly<\/strong><\/em> walked out and closed their door. Bingo!\u00a0 More times than not &#8211;\u00a0 they <em><strong>drifted off to sleep<\/strong><\/em> immediately. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">If they started crying before I left the room, I&#8217;d sit in a rocker in their room and quietly sing a couple more songs. This usually calmed them and allowed them to drift closer to sleep.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">If you break it &#8211; it stops working for a while:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">I found that if I <em><strong>broke the routine<\/strong><\/em> (an irregular bedtime or I wasn&#8217;t consistent with the steps) then it threw off their sleep for the <em><strong>next few days<\/strong><\/em> and it could take a week to get them back into the smooth and easy routine.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Some friends would think we were <em><strong>crazy<\/strong><\/em> when we&#8217;d get invited somewhere close to our baby&#8217;s bedtime, and we&#8217;d decline because <em><strong>it interfered with our baby&#8217;s sleep routine<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Friends who hadn&#8217;t experienced the ramifications of breaking the sleep routine just for one night &#8211; didn&#8217;t understand.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">It can be hard to give up flexibility in your daily schedule for your child &#8211; but it is totally worth it for them and for you. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Bedtime becomes a scheduled part of your life when they are young and the more you do not deviate from it &#8211; the <em><strong>happier and healthier you and your child<\/strong><\/em> will be for it.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Don&#8217;t forget about the mornings:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Be aware that to make this all work, you&#8217;ll need to <em><strong>establish a morning routine<\/strong><\/em> also. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Get up about the same time every day and <em><strong>greet your baby<\/strong><\/em> in a consistent way with the same few things in the same sequence.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Here&#8217;s my morning routine&#8230;<\/span><\/p>\n<ul style=\"list-style-type: square;\">\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">I&#8217;d <em><strong>come in slowly and gently<\/strong><\/em> saying, &#8220;Waaaake up&#8230; waaaake up&#8230; good morning.&#8221;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Then I&#8217;d <em><strong>rub their back<\/strong><\/em> for a few moments.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">And then &#8211; oh <em><strong>so very slowly<\/strong><\/em> &#8211; I&#8217;d <em><strong>open the light blocking drapes<\/strong><\/em> (which kept the room dark so I could control the day and night somewhat).<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">And then <em><strong>I&#8217;d say good morning<\/strong><\/em> to a few things outside the window. &#8220;Good morning trees&#8230; good morning flowers&#8230; good morning birds.&#8221;<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">When my children woke up on their own <em><strong>close<\/strong><\/em> to their <em><strong>normal wake up time<\/strong><\/em> &#8211; I&#8217;d pretend that I was the one coming into the room to wake them up.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">If they woke up extra early and I felt they needed more sleep, then I&#8217;d tell them it is the wee hours and gently say, &#8220;<em><strong>Shhhhhhh&#8230; go to sleep, it&#8217;s not wake up time<\/strong><\/em>.&#8221; If they fell back to sleep great, and if not <em><strong>after a short while<\/strong><\/em> I&#8217;d go back in as if it was wake up time. It taught them that there is a certain time to wake up &#8211; and Mom and Dad will let them know if it&#8217;s &#8220;wake up time&#8221; or not.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Bending will keep you from breaking:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">I <em><strong>set up a structure<\/strong><\/em> and did my best to <em><strong>stick to it<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">However, I&#8217;d <em><strong>bend<\/strong><\/em> the structure as needed if I saw that on a given day it was not working as usual. Maybe it was because they were up throughout the night which can throw off the whole structure. I&#8217;d bend the routine ( maybe holding them longer or singing extra songs) and then stick to the routine the next time until I saw it needed to be bent again. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Be aware that <em><strong>the more times you bend it<\/strong><\/em>, the <em><strong>less consistent<\/strong><\/em> it becomes and therefore, the <em><strong>less effective<\/strong><\/em>. So bend it only when necessary.<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Keep in mind; you&#8217;re not trying to force your baby to sleep. <\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">You are <em><strong>setting up good conditions for sleep<\/strong><\/em> and <em><strong>teaching your baby when it is time to sleep<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">You are creating a routine for your baby.\u00a0 <\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">You may need to adapt your own routine to make it work better for your baby. <\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Moderation is again the key. <\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">You must be <em><strong>rigid enough to create a structure<\/strong><\/em> for your baby and<em><strong> flexible enough to bend gently<\/strong><\/em> &#8211; fine-tuning your life to your baby&#8217;s needs.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">During the <em><strong>day<\/strong><\/em>, establish <em><strong>consistent nap times<\/strong><\/em>. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">As a starting point, choose times of the day when you are the most tired and <em><strong>lie down with your baby<\/strong><\/em> at these nap times each day. You&#8217;ll be getting some needed rest, and your baby will be more likely to sleep longer stretches at night because they learn a consistent pattern.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: left;\"><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Two steps forward &#8211; One step back:<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Sometimes <em><strong>vacations<\/strong><\/em> (when you\u2019re away from home) &#8211; especially<em><strong> time zone changes<\/strong><\/em> can wreak havoc on sleep patterns. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Stick to the routine &#8211; but <em><strong>don&#8217;t be surprised<\/strong><\/em> if it doesn&#8217;t work as well as normal. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Also, <em><strong>illnesses<\/strong><\/em>, <em><strong>phases<\/strong><\/em> of development, and <em><strong>breaks<\/strong><\/em> in your normally consistent routine can cause a good sleeper to start waking up more frequently.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">I&#8217;ve read that it&#8217;s natural for a one-year-old to have <em><strong>a sleep setback<\/strong><\/em> at about 13 months.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Give them <em><strong>extra soothing<\/strong><\/em> through these times while <em><strong>sticking as closely as you can<\/strong><\/em> to what you found works. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">It may take some time to get the routine working again. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Don&#8217;t abandon it. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\">Just keep trying, and they&#8217;ll eventually settle back into their <em><strong>sleeping and waking routines<\/strong><\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 22px;\"><a title=\"Moderation \u2013 The Key in Sleep Training\" href=\"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/baby\/baby-sleep-tips-contents\/moderation-key-sleep-training\/\">&lt;\u00a0 Previous\u00a0Chapter <\/a>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 <a title=\"Baby Sleep Tips (Contents)\" href=\"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/baby\/baby-sleep-tips-contents\/\">Contents<\/a> \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 <a title=\"Tired Signs? Don\u2019t Delay\" href=\"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/baby\/baby-sleep-tips-contents\/tired-signs-delay\/\">Next\u00a0Chapter \u00a0 &gt;<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The 3 Most Important Things&#8230; In real estate, the 3 most important things are &#8220;location location location.&#8221;\u00a0 In baby sleep, the 3 most important things are &#8220;consistent routine, consistent routine, consistent routine.&#8221; Do it over and over again: Daily repetition &hellip; <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"http:\/\/toddrsmith.com\/baby\/baby-sleep-tips-contents\/developing-consistent-rhythm-routine\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":391,"menu_order":4,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-444","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry","wpautop"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Developing a Consistent Rhythm &amp; 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